Dependent Origination

Archive for June 2013


Like I said, I have been reading up on landlording books lately. Those books are harder to finish in one fell swoop 🙂 So I decided to read something different 🙂 Well, the truth is I had been on the waitlist for this book for a few weeks and it became available but only seven days. I thought I wouldn’t have had the time to read it but downloaded it anyway. But once I have it I started to think about it and decided my life isn’t that busy that I cannot finish one tiny little book.

Turned out I probably shouldn’t started — I read a few hours two weekday nights, holding my own desire to read through until day break since work has been quite demanding. I was punished for three consecutive days by penetrating headache 😦 I guess no more reading at the cost of sleep before demanding work in the rest of my working life la. I miss the old care-free teenage years when I could finish a book whenever I wanted. Well I did that throughout grad school too. No more. Not any more. The saddest part is my irresponsibility in terms of reading and important work is still here but my physical body wouldn’t be able to handle the consequence of irresponsibility any more.

I finally finished the book today. A good book makes an hot day (by California standard) shorter! I think I read Nanny’s Diaries on the hottest every day in my second-floor apartment with copious amount of sweat dripping over my futon. Thank you all those books~

I love flowers and languages. They remind me of the old Japanese animation we watched as a young girl. I even wrote down each episode’s story line with the flower and what it represented at the end of each story. Well, on the one hand, I loved watching those animation series. On the other hand, I had to finish three pieces of journals every week for the winter break and it is hard to find interesting materials to fill up your journals when you were eight or nine staying inside a small apartment everyday of the winter break. But I remember those memories fondly. Back when I was elbow deep in trouble on my last job, a really old friend, out of nowhere, after like twenty or twenty five years when we last in contact, wrote me telling me he thought of me the other day when he was helping his two daughters picking out movies to watch. He suggested our old series saying there was this one girl who wrote down every episodes of it in my class but his daughters still refused his choice. He wrote me an email about it and it brought the old sweetness back to a very distressed me at the time. Thank you my old friend!

Aside from the Victorian language of what does each flower mean, I also learned more about the foster care system through the book. I felt bad about the children who had no family and no resource and no support but going through a foster care system. I wish everyone of them can find happiness or meaning of their lives one day. The story is nice and touching but in reality, that is probably not the usual case for a foster care child at all. The majority of them would drift through life, with material hardship a small piece of cake to suffer, the emotional trials brutal enough to do most people in.

The second half of the book is not as good as the first half when I was absorbed into figuring out the heroine and her life and why she behaved the way she was. She is a little too self-centered to me in the second half of the book. But it is still a good story, an old-fashioned good story. I love the message of it: how hard forgiveness is to come and how hard it is to ask for it.

If you ask me what is the meaning of my life, this time, or what is it that I am supposed to learn, supposed to improve in this life time, I think it is forgiveness, especially forgiveness for those who hurt me purposely. I know how hard it is and I am working my way through it. To forgive someone who had done something really really wrong to you, who took everything off you at the time, who hurt you beyond repair just for their own desire. In the end I need to forgive them all. I hope I learn the art of forgiveness to perfection this lifetime so that next lifetime I don’t need to go through this much hurt and suffering to perfect it any more.

This is probably my first time in keeping up with time in terms of writing monthly summaries fit to the public 🙂

The biggest thing happened is our new rental property closed finally. It all started end of April when I finally went to see an open house of our real estate agent in the past and we scheduled a lunch the next day. Turned out he had a deal which was on the verge of falling apart because his client couldn’t secure from her (second) husband a statement that he knew she was acquiring property and he agreed that the property had nothing to do with him. So he convinced me to give the property a try. We set out driving in the traffic the same day to view the house and I made an offer the second day. At the time I thought this pie from the sky must be a gift from my dear Buddha. Unfortunately it fell apart in the end with the seller agent tired of the maneuvers my agent had been doing. So I set out officially the next Saturday in May with him to check out houses doing the “market research” which probably should happen before making an offer. Good thing I liked one of the houses and made an offer. My agent had been telling me it is about fifteen offers to one deal for a buyer in the market right now so I wasn’t putting in much hope in the offer. But it was accepted, out of the competing bidders, without me raising prices much at all. So maybe the gift is this house not the other one, I told myself 🙂 Anyway, I have been reading a lot on landlording recently, and regret from the bottom of my heart that I should have read all these books three years ago then I would have managed our other remote house way better, especially in terms of the deductions it could bring us. Oh well. I have to remember everything has a book for it and reading can solve all problems 🙂

Work has been busy that it becomes the new norm and I don’t have anything to write home about any more 🙂 My plan for volunteering in the future is cut down on the projects with reaching out and I have since rejected an invitation to join a new effort for August. Needless to day it causes a small turmoil, most of which unseen since people are unlikely to speak out and inquire directly. My main reason is my busier work schedule, which is true. I want to focus more on my work — it is hard to say the amount of my volunteering hadn’t been happening sometimes at the cost of my working focus and time. It is due time that I shall focus wholly on work and see where it would take me. On the side note, I have been thinking about what makes me uncomfortable inside the volunteer organization. I think I have made progress on that front. I feel more deeply about exploration on my own now, which never happened in the past seven years. So it is probably natural that I went to my first meditation session with a Japanese zen center in walking distance to my house. The session is about 45 minutes which numerous people said was too long for beginners, unbearable time and pain. I thought the same thing would happen to me but it didn’t. I don’t think I meditate that well since I had spent nearly the entire session fighting either sleepiness or wandering mind and thoughts but when the ending bell sounded I was surprised since I was still hard fighting, so to speak 🙂 After the meditation, the most noticeable thing is my vision became so much sharper that the yard, full of trees bearing branchful of grapefruits, oranges, plums and etc, looks like a different place to my eyes and mind. I intend to keep on going a bit with it, see how far I can go. At the same time, I also realize I have all the symptoms Master says about a not-likely-to-be-successful meditation: the monkey mind and the sleep problem. That makes me feel that Master has known everything and I shall follow him closely since he appears to have the key to solve all these problems, which would be very hard to solve on my own.

Lately the horoscopes have been very accurate for me and family. Mom’s state becomes better — she is talking with least negativity in the past two or three years. The stars says Pisces is finally leaving the past two years of turmoil caused by parting, loss, grief, and transaction of real estates. How true description for mom’s past two years! The stars also say Gemini is leaving behind two years of extreme hardship behind and their luck for both money and career is up starting second half of the year. I hope my dearly loved family can benefit greatly from what the universe is giving them and steps out of the holes for the past two or three years and finds themselves some good news and enjoyable rides with life.

You have to create a filter with is:unread label:whatever and apply the action to all matching conversations. Then delete the filter later.

There are tips online saying that there is an option of selecting all matching search criteria in the search results mode. But I cannot find it, in the corporate gmail account.

谢谢大家推荐的各种网站 目前为止我最喜欢读远 书比较有意思 别的网站看起来噪音太多 过滤起来有难度 今天我下书把自己的Karma都用光了 所以新建了一个书单 想赚些Karma points 欢迎大家围观注册捧场互相增加Karma 🙂

书单是关于这些年读的和food有关的书 从为什么吃 到应该吃什么 人有没有理由去吃动物 美国的农业政策等等 还有怎么吃 各种食谱 还有食谱掺杂言情/人生感怀等 直接从豆瓣的读书历史上面列出来的 一下也有二十几本了!

但是最近几年food界新出的书基本上都没看呢 所以还是少下书多读书吧!:)

According to astrology, the universe is gearing up for me — said I should take advantage of the opportunity the stars and the moment is giving me, starting later half of May. I do feel that my life pace is picking up, especially the last one or two week of May. Work has been ramping up. It is not terribly crazy — just the kind of craziness that you know is only the start of real craziness! I feel both scared and pumped at the same time: scared because I haven’t faced this many/big challenges for two years; pumped because of exactly the same reason. Let’s see!

On the volunteer work side, I had a major argument with people — it is result of tensions for the past few months. On the one hand, I resolve to keep on volunteering because obstacles are not reasons for giving up. On the other hand, I think I should adjust how I volunteer by contributing more time to lamrim and its related work and toning down the time on helping reaching out to more people.

It so happened that just when I made the above decisions, a friend of mine approached me asking my help in volunteering for her nascent organization! I have been amazed by how things go when I am calm and clear about what I need in the past few years: literally every time I think of something it would happen soon, be it I need to find a home contractor then in the next few days I would receive home made flyers of a contractor recently retired from the builder who built my house. I have to thank the universe in this accomplishment and have recently realized that I better be careful about what I think of 🙂

I also realized for the bigger life goals, I should stop thinking of them as if I am planning. I should think of the end goals, imagine what would happen once they accomplish. This way, I help the universe help me achieving it! 🙂

Enough lesson in this — I find no one to talk about it since most everyone I told them about it was incredulous. Most of them commented to me that I must be dreaming and some even expressed concerns that I may need further help 🙂 Maybe they are right but I feel great about my powers 🙂

Anyway I started volunteering for this friend’s organization but soon got lost. To put more accurately not even two weeks into it, I realized how unpleasant and incompetent my direct group leader was and wanted to get out of it. They are having a big launch ceremony in June and I decide after it I would have nothing with them. I haven’t told my dear friend yet which would be a blow to her. But oh well, it has to happen for me to have a relatively sane and leisure life.

By the end of May, so many people wanted to eat lunch or dinner with me, that for the last week and half, both my lunch and dinner were booked. Some are large group gatherings — where I met some bright and capable and young people. Some are private where I got updated on the latest gossips of past work friends. Some are for people who want something from me, where I have to think before going about what I should be saying no to. I have been spending time learning about faces and even made real-life decisions based on what I learned — I am interested in tracking down the person I have made a prediction and see if those predictions go true or not 🙂

It is a month of energy picking up and I am so looking forward to the next month!

boto code reads from two key names “euca_access_key_id” and “euca_access_secret_key” from their own config file /etc/boto.cfg

however, both keys names “aws_something” in that file

to avoid change boto files, you can export AWS_ACCESS_KEY_ID and AWS_SECRET_ACCESS_KEY in bashrc and boto code will check environment first before trying to fish values out of its own config files.

date -d @1370378763

June 2013


  • is loving shelter-in-place, in fact 2 days ago
  • is sleeping much better during shelter-in-place 2 weeks ago
  • is emotionally ready for the next chapter of life 7 months ago
  • is memorizing Himalaya keyboards and learning to type Tibetan. So exciting. Chinese, English, Spanish, now my fourth language Tibetan! 8 months ago
  • this is a special summer 11 months ago

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